heros in a half shell

Picture it: our last night in Europe. Lee goes to take money out from an ATM on the Champs-
Elysse in Paris. Suddenly she is inundated by small children with magazines trying to block the screen and press buttons. D'Arc and I stood dumbfounded and were only pulled from our reverie when we heard a thud (none of us are sure whether it was Lee's arm or somebody's head) and Lee screaming "what are they doing!!" as she started throwing elbows. Luckily we were able to shoo them away and we all emerged un-pickpocketed. I am sure those of you who know Leah would have paid big money to witness her cracking the skulls of street urchins!!! It was a priceless end to the trip!

By the way, we did manage to see a few things in Firenze (despite all the gelato and vino!). I also had some quiet time at the Casa di Dante, learning about the inspirations for the Divine Comedy and we went on a hunt for the statue of Pope Joan in the Basilica in Siena (unfortunately a lot of the popes looked a little feminine so we are still in disagreement as to whether we found her or not). Venice was absolutely magical; the water sparkled and even the air was romantic!

And then (making up for our lethargy in Italy) we had two action packed days in Paris which included Napoleon's obscenely huge Arc, the fantastically gothic Notre Dame (complete with gargoyles sticking their tongues out at me), the Eiffel Tower (with its heart pounding elevator), and of course the utterly astounding Louvre (in which I could have happily spent four or five years in the Mesopotamia area alone). And with our viewing of the Mona Lisa at the Louvre, we completed a full tour of all the major works of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael, and Michelangelo (the party dude). Oh yeah, I know all about fine art!

I am currently in Zurich awaiting my flight to see my brothers and new niece, Shannon in Bangkok. So, thus ends the public record of my travels. It has been a friggin' whirlwind from train wrecks to Star Wars to Ninja Turtles. Thank you all for reading.

Love,

Jen

embarrassment of riches

Caio peeps!

I have made it to the land of naked statues, very rich priests, and all the pasta a girl could possibly dream of.

Yup, I have met Leah and D'Arcy in Italy and after three days in Roma and brief sojourn to Pompeii, we are now taking it easy in Firenze! Tough friggin' life, eh?

Rome is beautiful, and although there are millions of F.T.'s (fecking tourists), the city kind of saunters to to its own cobblestreeted pulse. We visited all the traps we could get our greedy little FT hands on:

The old Roman Forum-where Julius Caesar set up the first Senate, where great orators like Cicero expounded on about nothing, and where I got some great Live Long and Prosper photos in front of the Temple of Romulus.

THE Colosseum-where the ghosts of over 2 million dead vie with all the tour guides for attention. It was awe-inspiring just because of its sheer size and the imaginary stench of blood and decay.

The Palatino Hill -where Rome was founded after twins Romulus and Remus washed up and were suckled by the infamous she-wolf, after being sent to their deaths. I learned recently that this she-wolf may actually have been a hooker cuz the word lupin means wolf or whore...personally, I think the wolf seems much more likely!

The Vatican-where all the money put into St. Peter's could easily wipe out poverty three times over! I mean does God really need slabs of purple marble worth $17000US per square inch? The complete lack of actual spirituality aside, though, the Basilica and the Sistine Chapel were absolutely stunning.

Pompeii (the city that was completely buried by ash and volcanic debris when Mount Vesuvius erupted in 79AD) was very interesting. Because the town was covered immediately in ash, it was preserved virtually intact (including the people's bodies). This proved a little overwhelming for me when I came face to face with a cast of a poor lad's body; you could still see the look of anguish on his face.

We are now hanging in Florence, another city that suffers from an embarrassment of cultural riches, and we have managed to see absolutely nothing yet (which might be a record, cuz there really is a museum on every corner!). If we can get our lazy asses away from the gelato for a moment, we might actually go see Michelangelo's David this afternoon. Qapla!

Love you all,

Jen

P.S. Lee says hi (but only to those of you she knows). D'Arcy, on the other hand says hi to everyone!!! :)

beaucoup du Star Wars

Since I last wrote, there have been

-dunes galore (where the Sahara sand looks and feels like butterscotch pudding on your feet-in a good way!, and the silence is deafening),

-a moonlit camel ride to an ancient fort (where I discovered that 17 pre-emptive inhaler hits are just about enough to allow me on a camel for two hours),

-a rainy day at a Mediterranean beach resort called Telemaque (where Dirty Dancing meets EuroTrash 1992, and they employ perpetually happy people called Animators who force everyone to learn the cha cha),

-the third biggest Roman colosseum (where Aman, Luke, and I enjoyed our Gladitorial deput and got trapped in the creepy catacombes during a torrential downpour),

-and, you guessed it... beaucoup du Star Wars!!! Our first stop after the Sahara was the town of Tataouine, and unfortunately I gotta say that there seems to be a reason why its namesake is an Outer Rim planet that everyone (including Luke Skywalker) is trying to get off of! It was a bit of a one-horse town, but the forts and hilltop villages around it were wicked!

From Tataouine, we went to the island of Jerba for the aforementioned rainy day at the beach. Unfortunately, this day was further complicated by the fact that my system finally overloaded and treated me to a fever and then lots of yuckiness (which seems to have stuck around for the last 3 days). Luckily, in the hands of Aman and Luke, I am on a course of meds guaranteed to kill any unwanted biode in my body, with a course of malaria meds standing at the ready. For those of you still worried, I promise to go to the doctor soon. :)

Once I got sick, I decided the only thing that could possibly help was a trip to Luke Skywalker's actual childhood home. It is a former troglodyte home (an underground dwelling consisting of large, open air pits connected by a series of tunnels) which has been converted into a hotel. Yes, this is the actual set used in 1976 where they filmed Luke drinking his blue milk with Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru. I slept at Luke's house and ate dinner in Luke's kitchen!!! How cool is that? I also directed Aman and Luke in a little re-enacting of the scene where Beru (played very convincingly by Aman) asks Luke (played coincidentally by Luke (now can you see why I let him come along)) to remind his uncle to get a translator who can speak Bocce! Sign up for copies of that video right now, people!!!

I hope you are all well,

J

A short time ago...

I have hooked up with Aman and Lou and all is good in the land of sun, sand, Dido, and Star Wars.

With the events of Zimbabwe seeming like those of another life (perhaps another galaxy), I have embarked on a Star Wars mission in Tunisia, from which I have only just popped my head up for air, and plan not to give up until I have blue milk in my hand served by Aunt Beru herself. (NB: for those of you not quite on board with the Jedi-speak, I apologise in advance for this e-mail and those to follow until I reach Italy).

Tunis was beautiful and we managed to make our way to the Carthage, the ancient city of the tragic Queen Dido (who killed herself after the Trojan prince Aeneas decided he had better things to do-things like founding Italy-and left her). I do have another theory as to why he left her, cuz if all the statues we found of her are correct, it seems as though she might not have had a head in life!

From Tunis, we journied southwest to an oasis town called Tozeur, to get our first taste of all things Lucas. This came in the form of the actual set of Mos Espa (the town where little Ani slaved for Watto and won his freedom in the podrace). I had the Star Wars theme blasting from the little headphones of my MP3 player as we walked up. I got some wonderful photos with some strategically placed R2, 3PO and Boba Fett PEZZ dispensers! It was friggin' wicked! From there we travelled to the actual Lars Homestead (where now teenage Ani learns of his mother's near death and gets very annoying after he kills all the sand people). As you may have guessed, this was also very wicked! Then off to Star Wars Canyon (where R2 trundled along and got taken by the wee Jawas). Wickedness all around!

We are now in a small town called Douz, and will embark on a two day 4WD camping journey into the Sahara Desert tomorrow.

Love you all and hope you're well.
Jendu Hothu

twilight zone

I am in Zurich and holy man is the internet fast (the keyboard is freaking me out, though cuz the exclamation mark eluded me for the last 10 minutes and the z and y have switched places)!

Thank you so much for all your heartfelt replies to my last e-mail. My last three days in Africa were spectacular and my two weeks there have changed me forever. On Monday, a group of us volunteers went to Zambia to visit an orphanage. I played a lot of soccer with some very young lads (and was completely out-classed) and then taught them all the Vulcan sign for Live Long and Prosper (that photo is definitely a keeper!). It was a friggin blast and did a lot to lift my spirits even further!

Tuesday and Wednesday I went on an overnight canoe trip down the Zambezi River with Kath and Lisa and a beautiful man aptly-named Blessed. Now I imagine many of you are wondering what the hell I was thinking going on a canoe (given my penchant for A. sea sickness a.k.a. 'strokes' and B. not being a very good canoeist-as Bon will attest after our Ligurian debacle). But I survived and I was even made captain of my boat (and no it wasn't just me in my boat). And despite me as captain, Kath and I actually made it to our destination. It was absolutely beautiful, as there were hippos (unpredictably) popping out of the water everywhere and elephants crashing near our tent in the middle of the night (and in the morning, for which I was far too exhausted to even think about opening my eyes to witness; the sound of Kath and Lisa enjoying the sight was good enough for me!).

I have just spent the day in Zurich (spending most of my time mesmerized by the Alps) and have actually found my limit in terms of chocolate consumption. Who knew I actually had one!

I fly to Frankfurt and then on to Tunis (for some full-on Star Wars action) tonight! Bring on the Bocce, Aunt Beru, and Mos Espa!!!

Love ya,

Jen

To all the Worwickers, congrats on completing the production. Your people rock and don't let anybody tell you different!!

Yes, Dusty I did receive the photos from Autumn. Please thank her for me and congrats on not getting fired.

Omi, how are you doing?????

Jiggles, save all that craziness for our next Noraebang action!

Lee, I hope your mom is doing better. Can't wait to see you! Only two weeks. Now get back to studying, Missy!

Jo, I promise to try to look after myself, but your sister is quite the bad influence!

Faaather, good work winning the 20 bucks. I can always use the slippers!

Mammy, I miss you! Can't wait to see you in Bangkok!!!

How to refresh hope

On Sunday, two trains (a passenger train and a cargo train) crashed head on about 30km from our lion lodge. It is estimated that 89 people are dead. Five rail cars burned and it took them 8 hours to put out the flames.

Another volunteer (Kathryn-from Seattle) and I went to the hospital with two of our managers to offer any help they might need. Upon arrival at the hospital, we were met with a sea of hundreds of family members waiting outside the gate to see if their loved ones were okay.

The hospital was complete and utter chaos, but with an underlying type of organization that it seems would only work in an African hospital. Soon after our arrival, a helicopter came in. We rushed out with gurneys and wheelchairs and I helped a man with an injured leg out of the chopper and then pushed him into the hospital. Next came people in ambulances and again with the wheelchair, this time to help a gentleman with broken ribs, named Luciano. It was frenzied work.

When the second chopper came in, I grabbed a blanket and again rushed to the scene. It wasn't until I was within about 10 feet of the helicopter that I heard someone say "they are bodies". I was absolutely crestfallen. The hope that had ballooned as we all ran towards the chopper, seeped out of me. I put my, now useless, blanket over one of the bodies and went back to the hospital.

For the remainder of the day, we helped by giving food and water to everyone in the hospital. We started with the crash victims, then moved on to the regular wards. There were two women in the female ward who will stay with me for the rest of my life. We didn't speak at all, but there was so much strength coming from the eyes of their emaciated frames that I couldn't help but be awed.

Our last stop with the food was the maternity ward and we were able to go into the premature room where a baby girl the size of my hand was sleeping in her mother's arms. She didn't have to hang out in an impersonal incubator, just in a very warm room with her mom. It was beautiful. The mother asked us to think of a name for her and we came up with Precious. And when Precious woke up and opened her eyes, it seemed all the tragedy of the day had been washed away and hope was back.

Love you all,

Jen

How to fight a raging bushfire

First, get a stick.

Now, I know this may seem rather counter- intuitive, given that wood is actually fuel for fire. And I'm not gonna lie to ya...I was thinking exactly the same thing as I ran at the fire armed with my stick.

Next, name your stick.

I chose the name Bram for mine (as in Stoker-again maybe a little ironic given that I wanted to put the fire out and not stoke it, but it was MY stick) , but anything you choose will be fine (it is only essential that you name your stick, otherwise it will not help you!).

Next, beat the fire as hard as you can with your newly named stick.

Last, run like hell...especially when the flames get to be twice as high as you!

Repeat as needed.

So, we were having a regular day on Saturday at the Lion Encounter when we got a call that flames were nearing out lodge. Our Duty Guide, Nathan, piled three volunteers (me, Nicola-from England, and Zowi-from the Netherlands) and four Zimbabwean staff members in the van to go scope it out. We were armed only with two litres of water and an axe. I figured we were just going to check it out (for evacuation purposes) and then call in the fire brigade! How wrong was I?! Nathan said we would fight it if it wasn't too big and I found myself feeling that an axe and what amounted to a small puddle of water might not be entirely effective. Then the lad busted out with the idea of using sticks...

Confused but undaunted, I charged into the bush after Nathan (who used his axe to cut me a nice leafy Bram), ran full-tilt towards the flames, and proceeded to whack the crap out of everything on fire. I even perfected a wonderful slap-shot technique to douse the fire (keeping close to my Edmonton roots!). I was so charged with adrenalin that it was a least an hour until I noticed that my hands were bleeding. Frickin' amazing!!!

The fire brigade never did show up and in the end about 40 locals and us three foreigners (armed with Bram, Sam, and Danny) defeated the beast!!! I know I used the word exhilarating to describe my experience with Phoenix, but it doesn't get much more exhilarating than fighting a fire with a stick.

I hope this finds everyone well! Thank you very much to those of you who replied to me, as I love to hear from you. Sorry these e-mails are so few and far between but be assured that I am thinking of you and miss you all!

For those keeping track, I received my first bite from a lion on Sunday. It was from our 5 month old Amanzi who is so cute you forget he is a wild beast, but he did his best to remind me! Thankfully I was wearing a sweater, so he didn't break the skin, but I have a nice bruise on my right bicep.

Last night I went out for dinner and ate some warthog, crocodile and a disgusting, black, size of my index finger mopane worm (Survivor, here I come!). I went on a game-drive to Botswanna today (Tuesday) and got to see zebras, giraffes, warthogs, elephants, hippos, impalas and anything else you might remember from The Lion King! Life is good!

J

How to approach a lion...

I have finally made it to Zimbabwe, and (more import-
antly) I have finally found a relatively fast internet connection (it has taken me about 30 minutes just to log on!). Welcome to Africa, Jen!!!

I have just completed my third day as a volunteer with the lions and I often catch myself realising what I am actually doing. Everything is incredibly surreal. The landscape looks like a painting, with powder blue, cloudless skies (not to mention the punishing sun-in the winter, no-less), and the grass is that really long, hay-coloured stuff that looks like goldilocks!

I received my first and highly impressive scratch on my first day (from a 3-month old pride-of-the-Pride in the making, named Langa). No, no, lions are not, in fact, just really big cats! They are actually just razor sharp teeth and claws in a bed of fur, even the 'wee' 3 monthers! And it turns out that it is not a good idea to put your face on their belly (even if you really want to!). :)

Also on my first day, I was taught the proper method of approaching a, nearly full-grown and fully capable of disemboweling you in one swipe of their paw, lion. The head guide at our park, Ian, took me up to see our oldest cubs (the 18 monthers) and I will admit that the fear meter was pretty low-they are just cats after all, aren't they? Ian then proceeded to explain that one swipe of the paw was equivalent to 1 tonne of pressure. Uh-huh...fear meter starting to register. He explains that I must establish dominance by disciplining the lions with a whack across the mouth if they try to bite me, scratch me, or even look at me the wrong way. And I'm thinking...isn't that gonna just piss him off even more? He tells me to kneel down near the shoulder blade of our biggest cub (if you can call this ginormous razor with fur a cub!). The cub's name is Phoenix, but he is also known as Mr. Grumpy. Okay, fear meter through the roof, here people! And it is at this point that Ian reminds me that they can sense fear (yeah, too late, Buddy!). So, I kneel down and start to pat Grumpy Pants on his back. He starts to wag his tail (which, if you're familiar with cats, is not a good thing). Ian tells me to continue petting. Alrighty, then! Grumpy Pants starts to growl! Continue? Okey dokey...I don't really need my right arm, do I? Grumpy Pants turns and snarls and at that point my heart is just pounding in my ears and Ian tells me to whack him. Huh? Whack him? Whack him, Jen! So I whacked him! I hit the poor lad across the snout and told him 'No Phoenix!' (in my best teacher voice). And would you believe, in some crazy rule of the natural world, that earned me the respect on this razor with fur. It was one of the most exhilarating experiences of my life!

Love you all and hope you're well.

Jen